She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
