It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Randomize
