so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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