what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize