You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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