She announced her abortion via fbk
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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