Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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