Buhtt sex?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
