would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
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