I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Randomize
