That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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