So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
