Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
