i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Randomize