I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
