She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
