I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
