Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
