My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize