Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
that's an acceptable place to lick
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
