OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
