Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
His hands were made for my vagina.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
