real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
FUCK WHALES
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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