Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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