ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
