something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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