Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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