I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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