Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize