Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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