We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
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