Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
