we're blogging at a bar
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
