Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize