I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize