I am puke
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
