made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
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I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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