That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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