Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
