I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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