I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
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