i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
