Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
