the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
