redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
All I want is dick and wine.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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