ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Be still, my beating vagina.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
