She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
