Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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