white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
