went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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