You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
