Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
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